Friday, August 21, 2015

Good morning crew,

The wife persuaded me to take the day off today so we could go on a little day trip.

And when I say, 'persuaded' I mean she told me, "You're taking the day off on Friday."

Less than an hour away from us in the great metropolis of Munster, Indiana is a brewery called 3 Floyds. We have enjoyed several of their beers in local bars and restaurants, and when we discovered that their brewery is so close the wife decided she wanted to check it out. Plus, there is a restaurant close by there that was recommended to her, so we are going to make a day of it.

I think she was inspired by the wine tour of Michigan we took a couple years ago.

This trip will be much shorter and should prove to be much cheaper too, especially since among all of the wild excitements Munster has to offer there is not a single casino.

Less than two hours of driving, an hour at the brewery and an hour for lunch...how much trouble could we possibly get into in four hours?

Unless we get carried away at the brewery and somehow end up in Detroit Friday night.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"According to a new survey, about half of the world thinks kissing is gross. That half is known as 'married people.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"A man set a new world record after kicking himself in the head 134 times in one minute. He broke the previous record of zero." -Conan O'Brien

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"A winery in France is currently facing a rose shortage. For those of you not familiar with these terms, a winery is a group of women who have run out of rose." -Seth Meyers

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My wife, a registered nurse, once fussed over every pain or mishap that came my way. Recently, however, I got an indication that the honeymoon is over.

I was about to fix the attic fan, and as I lifted myself from the ladder in the attic, I scratched my forehead on a crossbeam.

Crawling along, I picked up splinters in both hands, and I cut one hand replacing the fan belt.

On the way down the ladder, I missed the last two rungs and twisted my ankle.

When I limped into the kitchen, covered in dust and blood, my wife took one look and said, "Those better not be your good pants!"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Physics 101

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi

2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 microscope

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: 1 lite year

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: 1 Rod Serling

Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon

1000 aches: 1 megahurtz

Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower

2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds

10 cards: 1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton

1000 grams of wet socks: 1 literhosen

1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche

1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin

10 rations: 1 decoration

8 nickels: 2 paradigms

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League