Monday, September 29, 2014

Good morning crew,

As it turned out, dropping a measly hundred bucks on the washing machine repair was just a warm up for the $450 bucks I had to spend on a new starter for the truck on Friday. On the plus side that four-fifty did include the tow.

I guess I should be thankful. If the truck had broken down two weeks ago in the middle of the move I would have really been screwed. So at least my bad luck is spread out in a manageable smear, sort of like a peanut butter and Murphy's law sandwich.

It just so happened that old Mason and I had plans that very night to go to The Hofbrauhaus in Rosement to catch their last weekend of Oktoberfest celebration.

We were sitting there enjoying our first half liter of Dunkel and I was complaining about the truck repair, the timing of it all and the general vagaries of life, when Mason patted me on the shoulder and said, "You know what? Let me take care of dinner and drinks tonight. You sound like you could use it."

I looked at him and suddenly his gesture lit a spark of genuine, fraternal affection in my heart. I wasn't seeing his congenital beady eyes and slightly flattened head, but but a human spirit of compassion and commiseration.

"Thank you, my friend," I told him. "I appreciate it."

He said, "Eh, don't mention it. I'm expensing it all as a business lunch anyway."

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"The federal government is starting to plan for climate change by making extended forecasts that can help people plan for extreme weather - because what can go wrong when you combine the efficiency of government with the accuracy of weathermen?" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Today an Indian spacecraft reached the orbit of Mars. Not only did India succeed on their first attempt, they did it on a very modest budget - $74 million for the mission. Which happens to be, truly, $26 million less than it cost to make the movie 'Gravity.'" -Jimmy Kimmel

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"According to a new report, Nigeria owes New York City over $500,000 in unpaid parking tickets for its foreign diplomats. Nigeria apologized and said they'll pay the fines right away if they we send them our bank account number, our PIN, and our mother's maiden name." -Seth Meyers

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A man was showing his friend a new set of matching golf clubs he had just bought.

"Doctor's orders," the man told his friend. "My wife and I have been gaining too much weight and we went to see the doctor about it. He said we needed more exercise, so I joined the country club and bought myself this set of golf clubs."

"What did you buy your wife?" the friend asked.

The man said, "A new matching bicycle and lawn mower."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
While trying to explain to our six-year-old daughter how much technology had changed, my husband pointed to our brand-new personal computer and told her that when he was in college, a computer with the same amount of power would have been the size of a house.

Wide-eyed, our daughter asked, "How big was the mouse?"