Monday, September 10, 2012

Good morning crew,

Well, we didn't make it out to dinner Saturday night. We did, however, make it to something called Chuck's Beer Fest in Burbank, Illinois.

More than fifty microbreweries were present representing over 100 different kinds of beer. And they were all packed under one giant tent in a stadium parking lot.

Hard to pass up.

When we walked through the gate they gave us a three-ounce sampling glass and we were turned loose inside the beer tent. That was an adventure.

Imagine a couple thousand beer enthusiasts, all somewhere between fuzzy and hammered on the intoxication scale, jockeying to get position in line at their favorite vendors.

Of which there were a few. We avoided most of that by hitting the vendors with the shortest lines, of which there were many.

You know, there is a reason most little, micro-brewed craft beers don't turn into a New Belgium Brewing, or a Sierra Nevada or a Samuel Adams. They're not very good.

I managed to plow my way through maybe 25 of those beers, and I found about three that I liked.

But it was fun, and that's the important part.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"A new study found that students who use Facebook while studying have 20 percent lower grades than students who focus. When kids who use Facebook heard that they were like, '20 percent? Big deal. What's that, like 10 percent?'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Studies show American students are becoming less proficient in math. Experts say we should have seen this coming, but nobody could put 2 and 2 together." -Jay Leno

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"English farmers are feeding their cattle healthier food to reduce the amount of gas they produce. Farmers also say they won't fall for the old 'pull my hoof' trick." -Conan O'Brien

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As a court clerk, I am well-versed in the jury selection process. First a computer randomly selects a few hundred citizens from the entire county to report for jury duty on a particular day. Then another computer assigns 40 of those present to a courtroom. Then the 40 names are placed into a drum, and a dozen names are pulled.

During jury selection for one trial, the judge asked potential Juror No. 1 if there was any reason he could not be a fair and impartial juror.

"There may be," he replied. "Juror No. 12 is my ex-wife, and if we were on the same jury, I guarantee we would not be able to agree on anything."

Both were excused.


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Woman: "No, I'm telling you, I'm right! He couldn't eat the Trix because he was an adult rabbit, and Trix were only supposed to be for kids."

Man: "Well, I always thought it was just because he was a rabbit and not a person."

[A period of silence -- the woman looks down at her food.]

Man: "What's wrong?"

Woman: "I'm just really getting tired of you always being wrong."