Bizarre News - August 22, 2015

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

To parents, their children are the most valuable things in the world. And when you are in a hotel room, what do you do with your valuables? If you follow this chain of reasoning to its logical conclusion you might come up with the same answer as this New York couple.

Police are looking for a couple from Brooklyn who locked their baby inside a hotel safe, police in Canada said.

The Niagara Regional Police Service said that the family was staying at the Howard Johnson Hotel in Niagara Falls, and apparently did not want to risk their precious little bundle falling into the water while they were sight-seeing.

Around 10:00 a.m. the family notified the hotel staff that the baby had been locked in the safe, and a maintenance worker was sent to the room to free the baby.

The baby was alert and crying, police said. The parents, who were on the scene when the maintenance worker freed the baby, left the hotel before the police arrived.

The child abuse unit of the Niagara Regional Police, said that it is still unclear how the baby ended up in the safe, although we can assume he didn't crawl in there himself. Police believe that the baby is less than one year old and small enough to fit in the safe.

I'm not sure this would qualify as child abuse. I mean, how much harm can a baby come to in a safe? If anything the parents were neglectful for forgetting the combination.

The U.S. Border Control has also been notified about the incident, but the family has not arrived back in the U.S.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Police: Intoxicated man tried to dig up dad to send him to heaven --*
STANFORD, Ky. - Authorities in Kentucky said they arrested a man accused of drunkenly trying to dig up his father's grave to help the nearly-40-year-dead man get to heaven. Michael May, 44, whose father, Odell, died in 1978, was arrested Monday night on charges of violating a grave, possession of marijuana, and public intoxication. May, who had allegedly been drinking alcohol and smoking marijuana Monday evening, was discovered digging up a plot at the Pilot Baptist Church in rural Lincoln County by a constable whose suspicions were piqued when he saw May's car. "I went back and hollered for him to step back in the light and he told me to step back to the dark. That's when I went and got my flashlight. He started hollering out [Bible] verses at me," Constable Delbert Mitchell told WLEX-TV. "He told me he was trying to dig his dad up, so his dad could go to heaven." May told police he does not believe he was doing anything wrong by trying to dig up his father's grave. "I see the truth.. he needs to be on the ground. Not under it," May said. Police asked May if he planned to make a second attempt to exhume his father's remains. "It's a possibility. If the truth doesn't come out and nobody sees the truth, yeah I'll do it again," he said.


*-- Kids play with barnacle-covered World War II bomb in Wales --*
BURRY PORT, Wales - A barnacle-covered buoy discovered by a pair of curious young children at a Welsh beach was later found to be a bomb from World War II. Gareth and Kelly Gravell, who visited West Beach in Burry Port with their children, 6-year-old Erin and 4-year-old Ellis, said they did not suspect the item was anything other than an old buoy when their kids asked if they could play with it. "We didn't take much notice of the buoy," Kelly Gravell told CBS News. "We were looking at the barnacles -- it was quite unusual." It wasn't until a couple of days later when Pembrey Country Park officials determined the item was actually a U.S.-made bomb from World War II. "So the buoy my kids were jumping on all weekend turns out to be a WWII bomb. Oops!!" Gareth Gravell tweeted. Park officials shared pictures of the bomb on Facebook. A video posted Wednesday showed the bomb being destroyed in a controlled demolition by Royal Navy officers. "It was a complete shock," Kelly Gravell said. "The story could have been a lot different had that gone off." "In the future, we're going to approach [unknown objects on the beach] with care," she said.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Dear Lewis, Just thinking about that woman with 13 kids who went to another country to have quadtuplets. somebody should have shown her to the looney bin instead of letting her have more children. I'm 66 and I can't imagine having another child, first of all, at best I'll live 20 years more and I will have died while my child is still young enough to need it's mother. That woman has, at best, shown she does not have the children's best interests at heart. It's like she is trying to compete with someone younger, maybe even one of her children! PS: Thanks to your column I have learned to overcome all of the bad karma I thought I had inherited over the years. Thank you for that! -Patti
[Well, you can't overcome bad karma just by reading Bizarre News...but it will definitely make you feel better about the decisions you've made in life, that's for sure.]

Lewis, Just wondering if you know whether Chadwick has been released from prison yet? Long-time fan/First-time writer...
[Ah, Chadwick. He wasn't nearly as bad in person as he was in writing. He left on amicable terms, more or less. He didn't even piss in TZ's gas tank like he so often promised. I think he works in Public Relations now.]

Lewis; The defense attorney for flight attendant who practiced medicine in his basement stated that others were trying to make him into a monster by saying he hadn't operated on anyone is BS. Prescribing medicine without a license is a very dangerous and potentially lethal thing to do. As for the bedside mannor, well, having been in medicine for 30 years as an RN, I've seen much worse in real doctors. -Wes

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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