Bizarre News - February 5, 2014

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Police responding to reports of screaming coming from a home in Maine didn't find a victim of domestic violence as they feared. Instead, they found an amorous pig.

State police say a woman called last week after hearing what she believed to be a fight coming from a neighbor's home in the town of China. The caller said she heard screaming and thought there was a domestic assault. Four state troopers responded and talked to the neighbor.

The neighbor explained that she raises pigs and the screaming was coming from an overjoyed male pig that had been placed in a pen with five sows in heat. I think many of us can sympathize.

Police say there was no assault and no disturbance "other than the screaming male pig."

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Woman arrested, charged for allegedly selling heroin at McDonald's --*
PITTSBURGH - A McDonald's restaurant worker in Pittsburgh has been accused of selling heroin in Happy Meal boxes, authorities said. Shantia Dennis, 26, was arrested Wednesday by an undercover officer who discovered the alleged scheme, CNN reported. Customers looking to buy heroin were told to go through the drive-through and say "I'd like to buy a toy," said a statement from Mike Manko, communications director for the Allegheny County District Attorney's Office. Buyers then pulled up to the first window, where they were handed a Happy Meal box containing heroin, the statement said. When the undercover officer carried out the drug buy, he recovered 10 stamp bags of heroin inside of a Happy Meal box, the statement said. Officers recovered 50 more bags of heroin, as well as some marijuana, from inside the restaurant, Manko said. Dennis was arrested at the scene and charged with two counts of possession, one count of criminal use of a communication facility, one count of prohibited acts of delivery and one count of possession with intent to deliver, CNN reported. Authorities said the heroin being sold at Dennis' McDonald's was not related to potentially lethal batches of heroin being sold in Western Pennsylvania.


*-- No charges for woman who attacked boyfriend in cuddling argument --*
BRADENTON, Fla. - Prosecutors in Florida said they have decided not to pursue a case against a woman accused of beating her boyfriend for refusing to cuddle with her in bed. A Jan. 24 Circuit Court filing from an assistant state attorney said prosecutors have decided not to pursue the misdemeanor battery charge against Shavonna Rumph, 31, who allegedly attacked live-in boyfriend Henry Price, 33, after a night of drinking, the Smoking Gun website reported Thursday. The Manatee County Sheriff's Office arrest report said Rumph became angry at Price Dec. 28 when he refused to cuddle with her while they were in bed. Rumph allegedly tore Price's shirt and threatened him with a knife during the ensuing argument.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Lewis, if I had to prove my marriage in court by providing proof of intimacy the court would have to declare me single. Then again I'm 71 and my wife became indifferent years ago. (please don't print my name).
[Your secret is safe with me.]

So maybe in Chicago Mrs. O'Leary's cow didn't really kick over that lantern but merely farted in it's general direction much like those cows in Rasdorf, Germany.
[I have never milked a cow, but I doubt it generates much static electricity, but who knows?]

Hey howdy Lewis! I always save the Bizarre News to CD's, then once I get a bunch stacked up, I go to the big city, sharpen the edges of the CD's, then fling them at illegal aliens, man...I figure even if I just graze them, the contents will kill 'em anyway!
[That is the most original use of content I ever heard.]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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