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Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
Valentine's Day is coming up. If you're the kind of person
who celebrates it, try not to do it like Arizona resident
Edward Rodriguez.
Rodriguez was arrested when a neighbor noticed a suspicious
person hiding in a ditch behind a vacant home. When an
officer approached him he noticed Rodriguez was shirtless
and wearing women's pants with a hole in the crotch exposing
his genitals.
The officer also noticed numerous pornographic items around
him. Obviously prepared some sort of romantic interlude.
The clincher was a plastic bag filled with a white powdery
substance, which later tested positive for methamphetamine.
What says "hot date" more that porn and methamphetamine?
No, if you want to give your significant other a thrill this
Valentine's Day, forget the porn and methamphetamine and send
him or her an eCard from American Greetings.
Right now (up to Valentine's Day) American Greetings is
offering a FREE trial of their eCards through GopherCentral.
Just click the link below to get started.
Visit: http://c.gophercentral.com/cTIW
Trust me, your sweetie will appreciate it more.
Bizarrely,
Lewis
P.S. Now You Can Follow BIZARRE NEWS on TWITTER:
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You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the
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+------------------ Bizarre Salt Facts --------------------+
If the world's oceans evaporated, enough salt would be crys-
tallized to cover Britain to a depth of 50 miles.
Being hygroscopic, salt spread on dusty floors in equestrian
centers and indoor arenas retains moisture and keeps down
dust.
Until recently, salt bars were the standard currency of
Ethiopia.
In ancient Greece, slaves were traded for salt, hence the
expression "not worth his salt".
In his painting The Last Supper, Leonardo da Vinci put an
over turned salt cellar in front of the ill-fated Judas.
In old Japanese theaters, salt was sprinkled on the stage
before performances to prevent evil spirits from casting a
spell on the actors and ruining the play.
In Arab countries salt was used to seal a bargain, and also
as a sign of friendship.
The Druids used salt in their rituals at Stonehenge. It is
thought that this was as a symbol of the life-giving fruits
of the earth.
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---------- Class ring found after nearly 20 years ----------
ORLANDO, Fla. - A Florida graduate who lost his 1989 class
ring when it fell from a cruise ship 21 years ago said an
Ohio woman called to say she found the ring. Tom Whitney
of Orlando, who accidentally dropped the 1989 West Orange
High ring from a Port Canaveral-based cruise ship the year
of his graduation, said he received an e-mail last Monday
from a woman who said she believed the ring had been found,
The Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel reported Monday. "It was just
this Monday, and I got a message from a woman who said she
has my ring," Whitney said. The message said the ring was
found by the woman's metal detector-wielding father along
Florida's Daytona Beach.
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-------- Strip club raises funds for Haiti relief --------
WATERVILLE, Ohio - An Ohio strip club said it raised
nearly $1,000 during a "Lap dances for Haiti" charity
event. Bosses at Marilyn's on Monroe, which does not
actually allow lap dances, said all the money from the
club's $10 cover charge Sunday would go to Hope, or
ISOH/IMPACT, a charity based in Waterville, Ohio, that
is participating in Haitian earthquake relief efforts,
the Toledo Blade reported. General Manager Kenny
Soprano said local businesses wanted to give back to
the community. "We'd been racking our brains for about
a month or so, thinking about what we could do," he
said. "You don't hear much about strip clubs giving
back to the community." I wonder if the money was all
in singles?
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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Hi there, I just had to respond to your letter today. I
would have given almost anything to have had a particular
person shed a tear. For ANYTHING. That person hurt so
badly inside but could never get rid of it. Actually I
don't see any harm in crying. For anyone, After all, it
is a cleansing for the soul. Sometimes it will allow us
to sleep after a good cry or it can wake us up and tell
us to pay attention. Just another flip on the coin. Have
a good one. -Kate
Hello Lewis: Your news is shorter than before, how come?
Is it your boss? There's lots of bizarre news here in
Missouri and we're just next door to you. I will have to
send you some links next week. -JT
[Send them! Years ago I would publish stories all the time
that were sent to me by readers. I even used to publish
the occasional column by a reader! That hasn't happened in
a long time.]
Lewis; I think a great deal of our economic trouble comes
from people crying about themselves. Politicians who cater
to the cry babies make things worse. -Brubrow
I think it's hilarious the way these cops are patting them-
selves on the backs about catching one mannequin in a car-
pool lane, and that this story made nationwide news. How
many tens of thousands don't get caught every day?! And
this deputy's excuse (passenger wearing sunglasses on a
cloudy day) for pulling the car over is laughable. He
probably thought the "passenger" was cute, and made the
excuse up afterwards. --M'Crager
A crying club? Really? What's next? Soon we'll be hearing
things like 'The first rule of Fart Club is that you do not
talk about Fart Club'. -Carol
[Carol...that's always been the first rule of fart club. When
you fart...you ALWAYS deny it...unless your drunk and then
you brag about it.]
Hi Lewis: This is for "Prepared Paranoia". Paranoid you are
the reason most people in the world do not trust or like
Americans. You do not need to own a gun in any other country.
Only in the US where you produce most of the guns that kill
your own people and soldiers do you need a gun. Don't get me
wrong I have fired more types of guns than most people ever
see, But I still don't own one or ever see the need to,
. If the US stopped selling
guns to the world there would be fewer wars right now and
you would not be losing so many American Soldiers.
-Sean in Canada
[To say that "You do not need to own a gun in any other
country." is not true in the least. In fact, in Switzerland
citizens are required by law to own a gun, keep it in good
working condition and practice with it. In other countries
the citizens desperately need to own guns, but the dictator-
ships they live under refuse to let them have them.]
------------------ END OF READER COMMENTS ------------------
Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
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