Bizarre News - October 21, 2015

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

California has turned into a parody of one of its own Hollywood movies as a crazed man wandered down a street in Oakland swinging at passing cars with a machete.

The entire bizarre episode was caught on video by an eyewitness who said it was 3 in the morning as the man stood on a street corner, yelling at cars.

In a short while he wanders onto the street where a car deliberately tries to hit him. Since most drivers would try to avoid someone in the middle of the street carrying a weapon, we could conjecture that the driver knew who the maniac was. He did manage to strike the car a glancing blow with his machete as it passed within inches of him.

Later in the video what appears to be the same car takes another swipe at the man from the opposite direction, then backs up and tries to run him over a third time.

But while 'machete' was mostly successful in dodging the first car, a second car comes flying down the street and hits him squarely with the hood of the vehicle, sending the man sailing about 15-20 feet down the street.

Miraculously, he immediately gets up and runs away, leading us to speculate that he might be a Hispanic 'Highlander'.

Police eventually showed up and arrested the man without any more incident. While no details were released as to what the hell was going on, and the vehicles involved were never identified, our guess is that is that strict gun control laws have reduced gangland hits to this. Whatever the story, I think it is safe to say that you should stay off the streets of Oakland after midnight.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Tombstone reenactor injured by accidental live shot --*
TOMBSTONE, Ariz. - A Wild West gunfight reenactment in Tombstone, Ariz., got a little too realistic when a performer fired off a live round that struck another actor. The Cochise County Sheriff's Office said the Tombstone Vigilantes gunfight reenactment group was putting on a street performance Sunday when group member Tom Carter fired off a live round that struck Ken Curtis in the upper groin area. Investigators said Carter had arrived late for the event and his gun was not inspected to make sure it was loaded with blanks. The sheriff's office said they examined Carter's gun and determined he had fired off five live rounds during the performance. A woman standing in front of the Bird Cage Theater during the reenactment was injured by shrapnel from one of Carter's shots, but she declined medical treatment. Curtis was taken to Banner-University Medical Center for surgery to remove the bullet. The Tombstone Vigilantes were ordered by the town's mayor to cease performances until it could be verified that only blank ammunition would be used during the reenactments.


*-- Arkansas girl, 4, requests CVS themed birthday party --*
FAYETTEVILLE, Ark. - An Arkansas girl's fourth birthday party featured a CVS theme complete with prescription bottles filled with mints, her mother said. Sarah Fortune Gill of Fayetteville said her daughter, Iris, sees the local CVS store as a wonderland of "snacks, drinks, toys, chap-stick, and band-aids," so much so that she puts the drug store on par with Disney World in terms of dream locations. Gill said Iris requested a CVS theme for her birthday party last week. "When CVS headquarters heard about Iris' party, they sent us tons of snacks, favors, and party supplies to celebrate. How cool is that? And when we told the local store manager about what kind of party we were having, he was so sweet to donate some
CVS-brand water bottles to add to the goodie bags. Not to mention that her year was MADE when they flashed a big 'Happy Birthday' message to Iris up on the big sign out front." The donated "goodies" from CVS included prescription bottles filled with mint candies, which Gill admitted in an Instagram post were "probably not the best idea for a party favor for kids." "And thank you to CVS who helped make Iris' fourth birthday so special. By the way, this is in no way sponsored by CVS," Gill wrote on her blog.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
Lewis, I call bullshit on the original story that states the van exploded because of the ammunition inside. There is documented evidence that ammunition will not explode in that manner when exposed to fire. The video linked below will show that firefighters in their normal gear are not exposed to any excess danger when fighting an ammunition containing fire. -David
[Sure ammunition will explode when exposed to enough heat (they did it on MythBusters). It just will not 'fire' as out of the barrel of a firearm because there is no compression. Still dangerous, though.]

Lewis, The reasons for calling in sick add up to 113 percent. Does this survey company also do political work? -Jeff
[The calculations were done by somebody who called in sick.]

Hello Lewis, In my house the kitchen knife is stored in the kitchen and because I am too lazy it is usually in the dishwasher. So do the Balazi's have sex in the kitchen or does Mrs. Balazi store her kitchen knife in the bedroom? -Jay
[What? You've never eaten anything in bed?]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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