Bizarre News - May 10, 2014

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

You would think this story happened right here in the good, 'ol United States of Bureaucracy, but this bit of governmental stupidity happened north of the border.

It seems Mike Defazio of Saint John in New Brunswick, Canada recently blew a tire driving over one of several large potholes in his neighborhood. Sick and tired of his local government's failure to repair the street he took matters into his own hands and spent half a day filling in the potholes using his tractor.

Of course, if you know anything about government you know that infrastructure, law, order, justice, education and everything else can just go to hell, but heaven help the individual who bucks the bureaucracy and tries to solve a problem by himself.

Three days later Defazio got a call from the city's deputy commissioner of transportation informing him he had broken the city's bylaws and could face a fine.

Apparently they were afraid that a rock could be kicked up and chip a windshield or scratch paint.

Defazio says he was told city crews would be out to remove his work and he would have to cover the costs. That's right, the city was going to dig up pot holes in the street and charge him for the labor to do it.

Brilliant.

So he was forced to hire a crew and return the street to its original pot-holed state himself.

The lesson here is; never do anything.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- 'Serial pooper' making a mess of Woodland Heights neighborhood in Houston --*
HOUSTON (UPI) - Houston police are trying to wipe out a recurring crime wave by flushing out the identity of a man who has been caught on surveillance cameras going No. 2 on lawns and driveways in the city's Woodland Heights neighborhood. The disgruntled dumper has been leaving messes all over the neighborhood, and has pooped at one house at least six times. "It's definitely not a nice thing to do to people," said Patrick Reese, who lives nearby. "Going to the bathroom in their driveway is not nice. That's definitely not something that's supposed to go on in polite society." It is believed that the "serial pooper" usually strikes late at night or early in the morning under the cover of darkness. The man usually cleans himself up with a paper towel and then leaves the soiled sheet on the sidewalk for someone else sanitize. "This is our neighborhood," area resident Aimee Parsons told Click 2 Houston. "Whatever people think should go on around here -- pooping is not okay. We don't want dogs pooping in our yards why would we want a human? It is very strange." Deputies with the Precinct One Constable's Office say the man will be charged with indecent exposure or criminal mischief charge when he is caught.


*-- Canadiens 'jersey day' canceled at Montreal school because of girl's Bruins shirt --*
MONTREAL (UPI) - An elementary school in Montreal was apparently so concerned about the fallout from a student wearing a Boson Bruins hockey sweater that it opted to cancel Canadiens jersey day. The event was supposed to happen on Thursday prior to the game between the two teams that night. Officials at Honoré-Mercier Elementary School canceled the event after a parent complained that an 11-year-old girl was asked to remove her Bobby Orr Bruins jersey on a prior Canadiens jersey day. "She's been a Boston Bruins fan all her life, so she kinda felt really bad. She felt kind of excluded from the school," her father, Tony Pasquale, told CBC News. Pasquale did not make the complaint himself and he was critical of the decision to cancel. "It teaches respect, sportsmanship. We can't all be from the same thread," he said. English Montreal School Board spokesman Mike Cohen defended the school's decision. "We don't think it's prudent for a student to wear a Boston Bruins jersey in a school during this very intensive playoff play," Cohen said. "At this stage in the game, with the Canadiens leading the series 2-1, why ignite things, why create a controversy?" Unfortunately for the administrators at Honoré-Mercier Elementary School, the Bruins won Thursday night's game 1-0 in overtime and the series is now tied up at two games apiece. Game 5 will be on Saturday night in Boston.


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
After hearing about Chinese kids walking cabbage around on a string, I suddenly feel better about our future, even as they beat us in math...
[I wouldn't worry so much about the math as the several trillion dollars we owe them.]

Gee, walking a cabbage "is a good way to strike up a conversation with another person who has decided to make a vegetable their pet"?!?!? Well, isn't that special? I always found that walking down the street with a kitten on my shoulder was a great way to meet people and strike up friendly conversations but doing it with a cabbage is just weird. But then what should we expect from a country where a dog may be the main course at suppertime? -R.S.
[I thought they ate cats in China (well, I guess they eat pretty much anything that walks, crawls, swims, flys or slithers over there...you can't be too choosey with over a billion mouths to feed).]

Hey Lewis- You'd think someone in mensa would know the difference between "then" and "than"

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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