Saturday, July 13, 2013

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Before anybody gets upset about this story let me just preface it by telling you that this happened in New Jersey, so it doesn't really matter.

But it seems a commuter videotaped 41-year-old New Jersey bus driver George Simpson Jr. masturbating behind the wheel.

The video shows him maneuvering the bus through heavy traffic and the Lincoln Tunnel while pleasuring himself. The bus was traveling from Carteret to New York City.

New Jersey Transit police have charged Simpson with risking injury or damage by removing his hands from the wheel. He is also accused of lewdness and reckless driving.

In a statement, a NJ Transit spokesman said the driver was immediately removed from service without pay because of "disturbing and grossly irresponsible conduct."

But because of all the semen normally all over New Jersey buses any formal charges or discipline will be unlikely for lack of evidence.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

Questions? Comments? Email Lewis


*-- Topless woman asked to leave New York restaurant --*
NEW YORK - The owner of a New York restaurant said he had to tell a woman to leave for taking her top off at a table, but he doesn't see the incident as very strange. Labinot Baraliu, owner of Verso in Manhattan's East Village neighborhood, said the woman came in with a male customer just after 9:30 p.m. Sunday and she was nude from the waist up by the time an employee brought them their water, the New York Daily News reported Wednesday. Baraliu said he quickly told the pair to leave. "I said to her, 'I'm sorry, Ma'am, you have to put your shirt back on.' She says it's legal to take her shirt off in New York -- but not in my business," the owner said. Baraliu said the man started taking pictures, but the two finally left when he threatened to smash the camera. Baraliu said he wasn't surprised by the incident. "This is the East Village. What do you expect? People are weird," he said.


*-- Detroit doctor delivers his 8,000th baby --*
DETROIT - A Detroit doctor said an infant he delivered this week at the city's Henry Ford Hospital was the 8,000th baby he has helped usher into the world. Dr. Richard Smith, 61, said 8-pound Austin Brian Jones was born Monday afternoon and was the first child for Lauren Hood and Andrew Jones, but was the 8,000th infant he has delivered since becoming a doctor, the Detroit Free Press reported Thursday. "Maybe I'll shoot for 10,000," Smith said Wednesday. "Because it is one of the best things you can do to help new life come into the world and work with these wonderful families." Hood said Smith was also the doctor who oversaw her own birth, which led to teasing from the nurses. "They were like, 'It's baby 8,000th. Do you know what your number was?'" Hood said. "I have no clue."


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
I don't kiss "random" guys while tipsy, just my boyfriend. And I don't get drunk, either--I know when to stop. Three glasses of wine or the equivalent is my limit. -Chris
[There you go gentlemen, if you find Chris in a bar make sure she has had at least three drinks before approaching her.]

I'll bet the guy couldn't tell the cops what the face of the nude woman swimming in his pool looked like.
[Women have faces?]

Lewis, I read this in our local news. Thought you might like it. "A Tulsa man remained jailed Monday on a peeping Tom complaint after authorities discovered him inside a septic tank beneath a women's bathroom at a Sand Springs water park."
[Why, when you read a story about shit, do you immediately think about me?]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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Send comments and questions to: LEWIS