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Saturday, February 4, 2017

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Police in Oregon said a man who arranged a rendezvous on dating app Tinder was left naked without his wallet and cellphone in a motel room.

Springfield Police Sgt. Rich Charboneau said the man, a Mapleton resident, exchanged messages with a female Tinder user for months before they arranged to meet at the Village Inn in Springfield.

The man said the woman, who used the name Lacey on the dating app, suggested he leave the door to his room unlocked while he showered so she could come in and join him.

The old 'Why don't you grab a shower and leave me alone with your wallet' trick.

Charboneau said the man instead found that when he got out of the shower, his clothes, wallet, and phone had been taken.

The wallet contained his debit card, police said.

"He's never seen her, he doesn't know who this is--we don't know either. We have some leads we're following up, but obviously we're telling people that if you're going to meet people, via that app, then I'd recommend meeting them someplace in public during the daylight hours," Charboneau said.

Police said the woman deleted her Tinder profile after the theft. So apparently a second date is not likely.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*---- Teacher Arrested for Doing Cartwheel ----*

Nothing emphasizes a middle school anti-drug talk like a quick pussy flash. That really cements the message that drugs are bad in the minds of 14-year-old boys. Maybe that is what was in the mind of 34-year-old Oklahoma teacher Lacey Sponsler. Either that or she just forgot she wasn't wearing any panties. But the fact is that after speaking to her students about using illegal drugs, Sponsler did a cartwheel exposing her backside and privates. Unfortunately for her (but fortunately for us) a student recorded the incedent. Sponsler has been charged with indecent exposure. Sponsler denied the allegations, saying that she just wanted to be the "cool" teacher. Her bail has been set at $5,000 (and the boys in her school have taken up a collection to raise the money).

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*----- Pickup Driver Parks On Top of Camry -----*

A bizarre case of road rage in Florida took an even stranger turn when a pickup driver backed his vehicle onto the car behind it. Ocala police said witnesses reported Adalberto Aponte, 53, was "driving recklessly" in his Toyota Camry before being stopped at a traffic light in Ocala, where he got out of his vehicle to confront the driver of the pickup truck in front of him. Witnesses said Aponte got violent while confronting the 18-year-old driver of the pickup truck, who was accompanied in his vehicle by his girlfriend and their baby. "The guy reaches in the vehicle and starts punching him in the face," a witness reported. Police said the 18-year-old then threw the truck into reverse and parked the vehicle atop Aponte's Camry. Aponte, who was found to have had his license suspended in August for failing to pay child support, was arrested on charges of burglary of an occupied conveyance, battery, driving while license was suspended or revoked, and criminal mischief. The pickup driver was not charged.




*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

Regarding the buck running into the women's restroom...See, this is what happens when bathrooms become gender neutral.


The expert who announced his child's birth with explosives should study and become a chemistry teacher-it's one of the few occupations open to firebugs that have a pension and medical benefits. Of course, you do have to get that pesky education and training in safety procedures.also, he should move to our town, as our block 4th of July party involved nearly 200 shells being set off. -Jean


Sounds like that woman who got taken for a tornado ride was lucky in a way that made Dorothy merely surviving in her house look a little bit sheltered in comparison--a bathtub is a lot less spacious than a house.


Our local paper carried a story about copper thefts from West Penn Power. On the SAME day this genius tried to sell the copper to a local scrapyard. Check out his name... "Jesse James Jones, 29, of Unity was arrested Tuesday when he attempted to sell 371 pounds of the specialized copper wiring at the Daniels & Miller Inc. scrap yard." -Mike

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