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Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

A skydiver plummeted 25,000 feet without a parachute Saturday over Simi Valley, Calif. - on purpose.

Luke Aikins landed squarely in the center of a 100-foot by 100-foot, two-tiered net designed to catch him. He was traveling 120 miles per hour upon landing, CNN reported.

The stunt Aikins calls "Heaven Sent" makes him the world record holder for the highest jump.

Aikins appeared to soar effortlessly above the California desert, arms extended for about two minutes.

Just before landing, he rolled on to his back, then plunked into the net, remaining motionless as it was lowered to the ground, at which point he stood and hugged his wife.

Using only the air currents, he completed the free fall to land on the high-tech net.

Aikins said during a broadcast of the stunt that he'd been preparing for it for two years, The 42-year-old had previously completed 18,000 parachute jumps and performed a variety of stunts. He has appeared on Iron Man 3.

"Everyone is calling this my 'coming-out jump,' which is ironic considering I've been skydiving since the age of 16," Aikins said in a press release he issued prior to the jump. He is a third-generation skydiver and his family owns Skydive Kapowsin near Tacoma, Wash.

Aikins is also a safety and training advisor for the United States Parachute Association. He teaches advanced skydiving techniques to military Special Forces.


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*-- Pregnant Woman Pole Dances While in Labor --*

Sexy. If you're into that kind of thing. A British fitness enthusiast posted a video of herself pole dancing with one very unusual twist -- she was in labor at the time. Kat Bailey, owner of PoleKat Fitness in Nottingham, England, posted a video to Facebook showing her getting one last pole dancing session in before heading to the hospital to give birth. "So...I'm officially in labor. Got a few hours before we go to the hospital so thought I'd do some pole between contractions," Bailey wrote in the video's description. The expectant mother's condition doesn't seem to impede her strength or flexibility. The baby already has an offer of employment from The Bunny Ranch outside of Las Vegas, Nevada.


*----- Dogs Drive owner's Car Into Walmart -----*

A West Virginia Walmart employee said a car that drove toward her in the parking lot before colliding with the building had a presumably unlicensed driver -- a dog. The witness said she was standing Friday in front of the Walmart in Wayne when she noticed a car pull out of a parking space and slowly start rolling toward her. The woman said she thought the driver might be someone she knew pulling a prank, but she got out of the way of the vehicle when she saw who was sitting in the driver's seat -- a dog. The car crashed into the store at a slow speed and came to a rest. A second dog in the passenger seat of the car somehow managed to roll down a window after the crash, the woman said. She said the owner of the car, an elderly woman, was paged to the front of the store. The owner said she had left the car running so the air conditioning would safeguard the dogs from the summer heat. A Walmart employee said damage to the car and building was minimal. The dogs were not injured.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

Lewis, The Orlando police must be the only cops anywhere who are not Krispy Kreme experts. -Joe in NJ

Well, of course it looked like meth. The officer's eyes were glazed. -Scott

Hey Lewis. The Fla. man with the possible meth really got to me. Of all people, cops should know there donuts. -Bubba Z

Actually, to walk around the world 1 mile from a pole is 6.28 miles. 2*pi*R, with R being 1 mile. --Bob
[Yeah, but don't miles contract the colder it gets?]

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

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