Bizarre News - September 24, 2014

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

A massage therapist has gone to extreme lengths to become a reality TV star, undergoing surgery to add a third breast to her chest.

The Florida woman, who goes by the name Jasmine Tridevil, said she spent $20,000 on the procedure a few months ago after finally finding a doctor willing to perform the operation.

"I called 50 doctors," Tridevil said. "It was really hard finding someone that would do it too because they're breaking the code of ethics."

Tridevil's third breast was constructed in the middle of her chest with a silicone implant and skin tissue cut from her abdomen. The surgeon was not able to make an artificial areola, so Tridevil had one tattooed on.

Tridevil, whose dream is to have her own MTV reality show, said her parents did not take the news of her third breast well.

"My mum ran out the door. She won't talk to me. She won't let my sister talk to me. My dad - he really isn't happy. He is kind of ashamed of me but he accepted it," she said.

As well as hoping for fame and fortune, Tridevil said there was another major reason she had the surgery.

"I got it because I wanted to make myself unattractive to men. Because I don't want to date anymore," she said.

"Most guys would think [the extra breast is] weird and gross. But I can still feel pretty because if I wore makeup and cute clothes, I can still, you know... feel pretty."

I think Ms. Tridevil grossly underestimates what men are attracted to.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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*-- Kansas dubs October 'Zombie Preparedness Month' --*
TOPEKA, Kan. (UPI) - The Kansas of Division of Emergency Management said October will be "Zombie Preparedness Month" to help residents prepare for the undead and other disasters. The department said Gov. Sam Brownback will sign a proclamation Sept. 26 designating October as "Zombie Preparedness Month." Devan Tucking of the Kansas of Division of Emergency Management said the zombie theme is a means of encouraging Kansas residents to be ready for a number of potential real-life emergency scenarios. "If you're equipped to handle the zombie apocalypse then you're prepared for tornadoes, severe storms, fire and any other natural disaster Kansas usually faces," Tucking said. "This is a fun and low-stress way to get families involved, and past turnouts have proven it to be effective." Angee Morgan, deputy director of the division, said officials incorporated zombies into the public information campaign "because it is an engaging way to get people on board with emergency preparedness." Officials said members of the public will be encouraged to prepare home emergency kits with survival supplies to last at least three days and disaster-on-the-go packs will be free for the first 300 participants at a zombie preparedness event Oct. 25 at the Crestview Shelter House in Topeka.


*-- Back injury leads to 100 orgasms a day --*
TWO RIVERS, Wis. (UPI) - A Wisconsin man whose back injury led to a condition giving him 100 orgasms a day said the near-constant arousal has ruined his life. Dale Decker, 37, of Two Rivers, said he has suffered a condition known as Persistent Genital Arousal Syndrome since he slipped a disc in his back and discovered he had five orgasms during the drive to the hospital. Decker said he has since experienced up to 100 orgasms per day, and the condition is less pleasant than it sounds. "When you're on your knees at your father's funeral beside his casket, saying goodbye to him -- and then you have nine orgasms right there," he told Barcroft TV. "While your whole family is standing behind you." "It makes you never want to have another orgasm for as long as you live," Decker said. "There's nothing pleasurable about it because even though it might feel physically good -- you're completely disgusted by what's going on." He said doctors have thus far been unable to help him. Dr. Dena Harris, a New York gynecologist who has worked with several women suffering from PGAS, said it sounds like Decker is in serious need of medical attention. "It's clear Dale is really suffering and I'm sure there are some people who will say that this is just in his head," she said. "But it's not -- it's a serious medical condition and I just hope he gets the help he so desperately needs." "Being aroused can be a wonderful thing, but this is not like arousal, it's not even sexual," Harris said. "It's a horrendous spasm and it can be terribly painful. Suicide is always a concern when people suffer from this condition -- they feel like they have no other way to escape it."


*-- READER COMMENTS --*
If it's legal for women to go topless in Texas, then I think I've found the problem. Not enough advertising! Apparently they are unaware of it because I'm not seeing it.
[Maybe the reason they don't is because people like you are looking too hard.]

Doesn't the contraband have to get to the prisoner before you can be charged for it. Never made it. Could be attempted but not really having done it. Oh, well. Nitpicking is just a hobby of mine now and then. -catt
[It is what is known as pre-crime. It is becoming more and more popular with the authorities and the establishment.]

As long as a woman doesn't bend over she isn't breaking any obscenity laws regarding the naked body. Exposing the boobs makes boobies out of men especially if they are driving. All a man has to do is stand up or let them out from between his legs if he is able to do that.
[Imagine what THREE boobs could do!]

*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
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