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Saturday, April 30, 2016

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It's official, Australian's will drink anything if it is has alcohol in it.

An Australian brewery is mixing up a unique malted beverage for an upcoming festival: a beer brewed using yeast from belly button lint.

The 7 Cent Brewery in Victoria announced that the 2016 Great Australasian Beer SpecTAPular next month in Melbourne and Sydney will see the debut of Belly Button Beer, which is brewed using belly button fluff from brewers.

The most flavorful kind of belly button fluff.

"Perhaps the first beer in the world fermented from yeast captured from the brewer's belly button fluff; there will be a little bit of 7 Cent in every glass," the brewery said in a blog post. "Some say why? We say why not?"

The brewery said the team created several trial batches
using yeast collected from different brewers until they
found the one with "the best character."

"It's perfectly safe. Yeast is yeast -- this beer is no different to any other beer out there," said Doug Bremner, co-founder of 7 Cent.

Bremner said the "completely unique yeast strain" gave the beer a unique flavor, which the brewery said "exhibits qualities of Belgian beer with the key characteristics being spiciness, clove and light banana esters."

The team said they were inspired by an Oregon brewery that created a beer using yeast collected from a brewer's beard.

A Polish brewery dubbed The Order of Yoni made headlines last month with a failed crowdfunding campaign seeking to finance production of beer brewed using yeast from Czech model's vagina.

So which would you rather drink, Bizarre News readers, Belly Button Lint Beer or Vagina Beer?

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email: lewis@gophercentral.com


*-- Florida Man Clings to Hood of Speeding Car --*

KENDALL, Fla. - I'm starting to get used to these stories. An apparent case of road rage in Florida led to a man clinging to the hood of a white car as it sped away from the scene of the argument. Witnesses said the driver of a black sedan argued with the driver of a white Volkswagen and ended up jumping on the car's hood in an apparent attempt to prevent the vehicle from driving away. The white car's driver had other plans, however, and left the scene at a high speed with the other motorist clinging to the hood of the car. It was unclear how far the car traveled with the man on the hood, but portions of the incident were recorded on video by witnesses and business security cameras. "The guy is lucky. I mean, he was still on top of the car when the driver made a U-turn," Sebastian Roldan, whose business security cameras captured footage of the incident, told local news. "That's super dangerous. You could fall off. It's crazy he was actually able to stay on the car." The white car eventually came to a stop and the man got off the hood, apparently uninjured. Police said they are investigating the incident.

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*----- Fishermen Find 60-year-old Six-Pack -----*

A trio of friends fishing in a Wisconsin river made perhaps the most Wisconsin-appropriate catch of all time -- a 60-year-old six pack of beer. Adam Graves and Christian Burzynski said they were fishing during the weekend on the Wolf River in Fremont when their friend Andy dredged up the six pack of Budweiser cans. "They were empty unfortunately, I don't know how good they would've tasted anyways," Burzynski said. "They would've been cold still, I'm guessing." The fishermen said they sent pictures of their catch to Budweiser brewer Anheuser-Busch, which estimated the cans to be about 60 years old. "We're just really surprised," Graves said. "It's not every day you find something like that out on your line. It's just something to tell family and tell friends." The friends said finding beer in the river is appropriate for Wisconsin, but Budweiser isn't necessary the correct brand. "Being from Milwaukee, it's usually Miller for us," Graves said. "But I guess whenever you can grab a cold one, you do." A group of divers investigating a 200-year-old shipwreck in the Baltic Sea in 2010 discovered several sealed bottles believed to contain the world's oldest drinkable beer. Experts said the cold temperature and lack of sunlight at the bottom of the sea prevented the beer from spoiling, and pressure inside the bottles kept salt water from seeping in through the corks.


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*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

What ever happened to the good old days when people could aim for Darwin awards in peace? Besides, sharks have to eat too.
[You forgot...he had shark repellant. Just like Batman used to carry in the old days.]


The 'Thanks for the bush, Baby' title was the first time I actually laughed at Bizarre News in weeks. I think you're losing your comedic edge, Lewis.


That bushbaby story reminds me of my all-time favorite Bizarre News story, the one about the man from Woonsocket (I still remember the name of the town) who tried to pay for a hooker with frozen steaks.
[Wow, you're going WAY BACK in BN history. That story is probably 10 years old. Thanks for being such a long-time reader!]

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

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