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Saturday, October 10, 2009
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
We had some excitement around the office this week. Our email
server, the one that sends out all of our newsletters, crashed.
Unfortunately, it took all of our email lists with it! So most
of this week has been spent rebuilding the mailing lists on
the new server. The only catch is that the backup file with all
of the email lists on it is not very recent. So a lot of people
who have unsubscribed recently might find themselves back on
the list. If this is you I'm sorry!
I'm not stalking you. There was just no other way to recreate
the Bizarre News email list. If you do not want to be on the
list please scroll to the bottom of the page and unsub again.
I promise you'll be off this time!
However, if you do go you'll miss some bizarre stories, like
the one about this guy...
A 25-year-old man was medevaced to Seattle with serious
injuries after accidentally shooting himself in the head with
a .22-caliber rifle.
Yes, it is as bad as you think. Three other adults were
present at the time of the shooting and they all gave the
same description of what happened.
The group was planning to go to the gun range, and one of
the other adults raised the concern about whether the rifle
was loaded. The man joked that there was one way to find out
if it was loaded and, at that point, he reportedly put the
rifle in his mouth and pulled the trigger.
Neither alcohol nor drugs appear to have played a role in the
incident, police reported, which means this was pure stupidity!
Bizarrely,
Lewis
P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the
new Bizarre News forum. Check it out here...
http://bizarrenews.gophercentral.com
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+------------ Bizarre National Superstitions -------------+
In Iceland, an unmarried person who sits at the corner of
a table won't marry for seven years. A pregnant woman who
drinks from a cracked cup risks having a baby with a hare-
lip.
In Japan, picking up a comb with its teeth facing your
body brings bad luck.
In Malta, churches with two towers are fitted with a clock
face in each but the two clocks always tell different
times to confuse the Devil about the time of the service.
In Nigeria, a man hit with a broom becomes impotent unless
he retaliates seven times with the same broom. Sweeping a
house at night brings misfortune to the occupants.
In Poland, bringing lilac into the house is a sure sign
of impending death.
In Scotland, red and green should never be worn together.
It is unlucky to throw vegetables on to the fire and to
carry a spade through the house. This means that a grave
will soon be dug. And three swans flying together means
a national disaster is imminent.
In Holland, people with red hair bring bad luck.
In China, sweeping out a house removes all the good luck,
especially on Chinese New Year.
***
------------ Swedish church opens gas station --------------
TARNSJO, Sweden - The Church of Sweden said it is preparing
to open the country's first church-operated gas station
near a town with no other fuel pumps. The gas station near
the village of Tarnsjo, which hasn't had its own gas
station since last winter, is set for a grand opening
Saturday alongside a connected convenience store, The Local
reported. The church said a joint-stock company it created
will be responsible for operating the service station,
which was built using a $715,000 investment from parish
members. "Our own petrol station is important for the
survival of the whole village," parish council chair Per
Eriksson said.
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-------------- Woman text messages robber ---------------
SOUTH BEND, Ind. - Police in Indiana said a woman invited
to spend the night at a man's apartment apparently summon-
ed an armed attempted robber with a text message. South
Bend police said the 22-year-old man told them the woman
he invited to spend the night at his apartment in the Park
Jefferson complex Monday began sending frequent text
messages after she saw him remove a large roll of money
from his jacket pocket, the South Bend (Ind.) Tribune
reported. The man said he soon heard a knock at the door
and answered it to find a masked man holding a gun. He
said the armed man hit him in the head and demanded money,
but instead the man fled and called police from another
part of the apartment complex. The armed man and the woman
were gone when police arrived and the man said there did
not appear to be anything missing from his apartment.
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---------- Man's arm stuck in toilet for 3 hours -----------
CHERNIGOV, Ukraine - Ukrainian emergency responders said
it took three hours to free a man whose arm became lodged
in the toilet while he was trying to retrieve dropped
cash. The rescuers told ukranews.com the 47-year-old man
quickly shoved his arm into the toilet in the city of
Chernigov when he dropped $24 into the commode and his
arm became stuck up to the elbow in the chute, RIA Novosti
reported Thursday. The emergency workers said they removed
floor tiles and uprooted the toilet, but the man remained
stuck until they used hydraulic shears and a plumber's
torch to completely destroy the throne. The man was not
injured but the responders said he was unsuccessful in
trying to retrieve his money.
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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Lewis, An older couple was watching the National Geographic
channel when they witnessed Africa natives that had 18 inch
penises. This was accomplished by hanging stones with a
string from the member to stretch it to a lofty length.
The woman told her husband we should try that. They hung
a brick from his weener and a week later the gentleman
announced, "We are half way there." The woman exclaimed,
"You have 9 inches?" The guy replied, "No, but it's
turned black!"
[You people really need to be sending these comments to TZ.]
What happened? I haven't gotten any ezines from you, Joe, or
TZ in over a week. Don't you guys like me anymore? -Maygyver
[You're subscribed to all three of us? That's what I call an
eclectic taste in reading!]
This is a link to a local news story here in NW Iowa. It's
the KCCI tv news website about someone dressing up a dead
deer in a clown wig and clown suit. I hope you don't get
too many emails about this story.... It seems like some-
one has a LOT of time of their hands to go to this kinda
trouble for a really odd prank. the idea that some guys
sitting around drinking and one says...hey wouldn't it be
funny if....and then they all said...yeah. lets do it.
I'm glad I'm not in Sioux City.
[Yes, I think we can pretty safely assume that a large amount
of alcohol was involved with this story.]
I was just catching up on some past issues and hope I can
still get a comment in on Stephanie's comments from a couple
of weeks ago about global warming. Tsunamis are caused by
underwater earthquakes. Is she saying underground earthquakes
are caused by global warming? And the drowning polar bear
stuff came from a single sighting of 4 drowned polar bears
and a bunch of speculation of why they drowned. I am with
you, drop the rhetoric and just try to adopt a cleaner life-
style. -Tim
Regarding the Tufts University story...wouldn't the sexual
harassment laws qualify? They did at UIS (Univeristy of
Illinois at Springfield) when I had to take the required
sexual and racial harassment class to graduate. Keep up the
great news and comments Lewis... Martin
[They have classes for sexual and racial harassment? Huh!
I guess a simple swat on the ass and a "Nice tits, honey"
just doesn't cut it any more.]
------------------ END OF READER COMMENTS ------------------
Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: mailto:lewis@gophercentral.com