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Saturday, January 16, 2010
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
It's a brave new world. The line between the genders have
been blurred in many fields that were once considered
gender specific. No one even bats an eye at a male nurse
anymore. Women are flying combat missions in the military.
And in many churches the clergy is open to anyone (even a
homosexual in one case).
Now the mainstream has opened the door to one of the last
gender specific careers...prostitution.
Nevada is the only state in the Union to allow legal pro-
stitution. While men may have always engaged in the business
of prostitution in seedy motel rooms all over the country
(and usually for male clients), Nevada is, by default, the
industry standard for prostitution in the United States.
And now they have their first male pro.
25-year-old "Markus" (his working name) got his start in
the adult film industry, but he found it too cold and
calculated. In his own words he views himself as an artist,
a performer, and prostitution as a craft that has to be
learned.
"I think for a male, if you want to be successful in this
type of venture, you're not a prostitute. You're a surrogate
lover," said Markus. "You encompass everything that's
required of you?not only emotionally, physically?but psycho-
logically. Because women are wired differently. They're much
more sensitive creatures. You actually have to enjoy what you
do. You can't necessarily say, 'Oh, it's just a job.' You
actually have to say it's a passion."
So if you're a woman in Nevada and looking for a little
entertainment, make sure to check out the Shady Lady Ranch,
two-and-a-half-hours northwest of Las Vegas. It's $200 for
40 minutes and according to Markus you'll leave feeling much
more empowered, and much more confident in yourself.
Bizarrely,
Lewis
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Bizarre Video - Shaolin Monk Balances of Two Fingers
These are Shaolin monks from Henan Province in China.
They are in Hong Kong to demonstrate the 'Two Finger
Zenist Kung Fu.' Si Xingsong, 19 at the time, is said
to be one of only two people in the world who can do
this!
View: http://www.evtv1.com/player.aspx?itemnum=15580
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--------- Police reprimanded for shield sledding ---------
OXFORD, England - Police in England said a group of
officers caught on camera using a riot shield as a sled
on a snow slope were reprimanded by a superior. Super-
intendent Andrew Murray, Oxford City commander with Thames
Valley Police, said a bystander captured video of a group
of officers arriving at the slope and encouraging a
colleague to sled down the hill while clinging to the
straps for steering, the Daily mail reported. The video
was later uploaded to YouTube. "The snow has a habit of
bringing out the child in all of us," Murray said. "I have
spoken to the officers concerned and reminded them in no
uncertain terms that tobogganing on duty, on police equip-
ment and at taxpayers' expense is a very bad idea should
they wish to progress under my command."
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--------- Boy calls police to surrender pacifiers ----------
TARANTO, Italy - Police in an Italian city said a 4-year-
old boy who considered himself too old for his pacifiers
called authorities to surrender the baby toys. Taranto
police said the boy called the emergency line a few days
before his birthday and explained that he thought the
police should have his old pacifiers, ANSA reported. "I'm
old enough now so you can have my dummies," the boy told
the operator. Police said two officers visited the boy's
birthday party and traded him a souvenir hat in exchange
for his four old pacifiers.
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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
I cannot believe I am seeing this in your column. I just
watched a program on Tru with Jesse Ventura trying to
investigate this place in Alaska that is suppose to be
doing these experiments. This place was called Harp.
According to what the people he talked to were saying,
they are making some kind of energy beam that can change
the weather and stuff like that. I was very disturbed
when I saw it. This is an amazing story. I can only pray
that they mean to use this for good things. -Mary Rogers
Bizarre packaging instructions: "Instructions: Tear open,
unfold, and use" - Found on the back of a wet-nap.
Regarding the steel pipe / penis / ice water suggestion;
if the sight of a man going down on your penis with an
electic grinder doesn't kill your erection, I doubt ice
water will have much effect. -Maygyver
[I guess it depends on how kinky you are.]
One of your readers wrote, "a simple solution would have
been to pack the pecker and pipe in ice water." But I
want to know who's going to Pick the Pipe Peterers Pecker
Packer? -Don
Lewis, I live in Florida and have for many years. As a
retired navy CPO, I've been in most of the continental
United States and I've noticed that there's not a lot of
difference in the quality of drivers in any of them. As
to Florida not having any rules governing driver's
license for elderly people, I renewed my license last
year (I'm 66) and I had to take an eye exam. As a matter
of fact, my eyes are better now, than 20 years ago. I was
able to renew my license without the eyeglass restriction.
So I'm good for another 8 years. I think that is too long
to go between renewals, especially for anyone over 60, but
at least they do check that every once in a while. --Rick
Hey Lewis: Get your terms right it's not "Global Warming"
it's Climate Change. GW was a Bush era term, designed to
make it easier for G.W. Bush to remember. When will the
have a naked bus ride? -Sean
[And here I thought "Climate Change" made it easier for
lobbyists to push their agenda whichever way the climate
happened to be moving that particular year.]
------------------ END OF READER COMMENTS ------------------
Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: mailto:lewis@gophercentral.com
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