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January 16, 2016

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

When is better at a barbecue; pork chops or breasts? How about both? Especially when the chops are flame grilled and the breasts are bare...and belong to a woman...who is drunk and violent.

The breasts belong to 31-year-old Christine Taylor who had been drinking at her trailer park in Florida. The fun started when a deputy went to the trailer park to investigate a report of a disturbance.

It seems that Ms. Taylor had been "trying to fight people in the trailer park," according to one victim who called in the complaint.

Earlier, Taylor was accused of toppling a barbecue grill and tossing pork chops all over the lawn.

She is then quoted as yelling, "What's up bro!" Before threatening to cut the victim with a beer bottle.

It was at this point that Taylor lifted her shirt, revealing her breasts to the victim and his three children. Perhaps because her breasts are more intimidating than a broken beer bottle. There are no images of the perpetrator's breasts, so it is hard to tell.

Taylor was arrested on a disorderly conduct charge, and most of the pork chops were salvaged due to the 20 second rule.

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email: lewis@gophercentral.com


* Naked woman goes on rampage in Waffle House *

What is it with naked women this week? A woman is facing several charges after going on a rampage at a Waffle House restaurant in Georgia, all while completely naked. According to police, the woman, identified as Jennifer Nicholson, stripped off her clothes, punched a woman in the face and then threw a plate at a window. She also threw several platters at patrons of the restaurant. When police tried to subdue Nicholson, she fought back. The woman who was punched sustained a broken nose in the attack, according to police. Nicholson is facing several assault and public indecency charges.

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* Customer pays at drive-thru with cash, heroin *

Indiana police said a man paying for his McDonald's food handed a bag of heroin to a drive-through worker along with his money. The police report of the incident said an employee at the McDonald's in LaPorte took money from a male driver who appeared intoxicated and she sorted the bills to discover a green plastic baggie containing a "rock-like substance." Police said the substance "appeared to be heroin" and later testing confirmed the presence of the drug. Police said the man likely handed over the heroin by accident. "It shows you how significant the problem is here that we're battling," Metro Operations Coordinator Harlan Williams said.

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*---- READER COMMENTS ----*

The story about the couple holding luggage hostage over a Hello Kitty toothbrush contains several grammatical errors. Do you just copy and paste these stories without re-reading them or do you (or your staff) type them without proofing? I've noticed a growing number of grammar/spelling errors in the news lately. Apparently, very few "professionals" bother proofing anymore.
[You must be new to the Internet. On behalf of myself and the infinite number of other monkey here let me say, welcome.]


I don't see why the cops got so pissed off (heh heh) by some woman urinating on them. Some guys pay a lot of money for that kind of thing.
[I try not to judge people, but...gross.]


What's wrong Lewis, haven't you ever gotten a thrill from doing something you weren't supposed to, like shop-lifting? This isn't Bonnie and Clyde, these were just a couple of kids getting a little wild. I hope one stupid day doesn't ruin their entire futures.
[Nah, their futures won't be ruined until they squeeze out a couple of rug rats and then get divorced. THEN their lives will be ruined.]

*---- END OF READER COMMENTS ----*