Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Greetings fellow Bizarros: Who says China is not westernized? There is no greater icon of western consumerism than a manic, shopping-obsessed woman, and the woman in today's story has set a new precedent for taking shopping to the extreme; she shopped until her boyfriend killed himself.
Okay, there were probably some underlying issues involved, but most men can appreciate the feeling of frustration when a woman just will. not. stop. going from store to store, uttering empty promises of, "this is the last one."
This man, 38-year-old Tao Hsiao, was escorting his girlfriend around a shopping mall in Xuzhou, Jiangsu province, east China. After five hours Tao finally had enough and demanded to go home.
Eyewitnesses say he could be heard saying they already had more bags than they could carry, but she insisted on going into one more shop where the was a special offer on shoes.
An eyewitness said: "He told her she already had enough shoes, more shoes that she could wear in a lifetime and it was pointless buying any more.
"She started shouting at him accusing him of being a skinflint and of spoiling Christmas, it was a really heated argument."
The shouting match ended when the man threw the bags on the floor and jumped over the balcony, smashing into Christmas decorations on his way down before hitting the floor seven stories below causing shocked shoppers to flee in panic.
If that is not a metaphor for the commercialization of Christmas nothing is.
It is not known whether the woman eventually got her last pair of shoes.
Bizarrely,
LewisP.S.
PulseTV Customers, remember Thursday (by 10 a.m.) is the last day to get your order in time for Christmas with standard shipping! Questions? Comments?
Email Lewis*-- 'Well dressed grandmas' steal cookies in motel heist --*DOUGLAS, Mich. - The manager of a Michigan motel said a trio of "well-dressed grandmas" were behind the theft of more than 100 cookies baked for a contest. Rusty Ross, general manager of the Blue Star Motel in Douglas, said the cookies were made for a "best cookie" competition among 18 local motels, but the Blue Star's first foray into competitive cookies was canceled when three women pulled off a heist, WZZM-TV, Grand Rapids, reported Tuesday. "A spritz butter cookie is what it was," Ross said. "A group of ladies showed up. One of the ladies asked if they could see a room, so I showed her the room." Ross said the other two women made off with the cookies while he was showing the room. He said the woman who asked to see the room left without booking a reservation or even giving her name. "If it was kids, maybe you'd say it was funny because the kids took it, but these were well-dressed grandmas, older-looking women," he said. Police are investigating and Ross said the motel is offering a free stay to anyone who offers information leading to the suspects.
*-- N.J. man wakes up from 10-hour sleep with knife in back --*TRENTON, N.J. - A New Jersey man awoke from a 10-hour sleep with an aching back only to be told by his brother the cause was a 5-inch knife blade stuck in it, police said. The 42-year-old Trenton man not only was expected to survive but to be out of the hospital in short order, Trenton police said. The unidentified victim, who had been drinking, was stabbed when he got into a fight on his porch about 2 a.m. Sunday, went to sleep without realizing he was wounded and woke up hurting but still unaware of his predicament, police Lt. Mark Kieffer said. "And his brother said he had a knife blade protruding from his back," Kieffer said. The victim was "very uncooperative" when investigators tried to interview him at the hospital, Kieffer told the Times of Trenton. The assailant, who fled during the fight, had not been caught, police said.
*-- READER COMMENTS --*Lewis; I'm amazed that the line "you have a beautiful aura will you give me $15,000 for three rocks" would work so well. Well, tell the stupid what they wanna hear and they will give you anything. Besides who says he didnt cleanse her of evil? He took her money, didnt he, which is the root of all evil. -Wes
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Maybe we should start including statement about our customers' auras at our store www.pulsetv.com. But our customers are too intelligent, cultivated and good looking to fall for something like that.]
Lewis; Dont under estimate what a bunch of toothless illiterates will do for a beer.
Lewis, In response to one of your comments in the last issue: you really should refrain from using the word retarded. It is a very hurtful and derogatory word.
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Would you prefer window-licker or perhaps mouth-breather?]
I live in Alabama. I am offended by your remarks. Cousins are as safe in Alabama, as they are in any other state. Plus you can't marry your gay cousin in Alabama like you can in a lot of northern states. -HANK
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But at least when two homosexuals marry they won't be having any inbred, two-headed babies.]
*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*Missed an Issue? Visit the Bizarre News ArchivesWell, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: LEWIS