Powered By

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Everybody has been talking about this story that happened at the Cincinnati Zoo where a four-year-old boy managed to climb through, over or around the barriers and fell into the gorilla enclosure. A 17-year-old silverback started playing with the child, and instead of taking any chances, zoo staff shot and killed the animal before it could do any real harm.

The Internet immediately began filleting the parents, publishing such vitriol on social media as, "How about blaming the f***ing numb-nut parents. Shoot them not the Gorilla."

But without knowing the details it is difficult to cast too much blame, unlike a much less well read story that just came out of Japan.

Rescue teams there are searching for a seven-year-old boy missing for two days on a mountain range after his parents abandoned him "as punishment."

The boy, Yamato Tanooka first went missing at around 4 p.m. local time on Saturday, according to a spokesman for the Hokkaido Prefectural Police. He said police had received an emergency call from his parents at around 6 p.m., and were initially told that the boy had gone missing while on a day trip to the area with his parents and sister.

The area is known to be home to wild bears.

The parents later admitted to police they had left the boy alone in the mountains while on the way home to punish him for throwing stones at passing cars and people. The boy's father suggested the family had hesitated in reporting him missing because of the circumstances surrounding his disappearance.

"I was not able to ask for (a search) with a reason of punishment," the father said. "I thought it might be taken as a domestic violence."

The parents immediately drove back to where they had left the boy, but he was no longer there, according to the police spokesman.


P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Click

Questions? Comments? Email:

*-------- Sounds Like a Successful Date --------*

A Massachusetts high school student went to a doctor the day after prom to remove the boutonniere pin she accidentally inhaled before the party. Kathleen Garvey, a senior at Wellesley High School, said her prom date, Colin Emerson, was having trouble keeping his boutonniere from falling off during the bus ride to prom so she placed the pin in her mouth while adjusting the floral arrangement. A likely story. "He made some funny joke and I laughed and inhaled it but wasn't positive that's what had happened," she told local news. "I wasn't in pain or anything, and the only thing happening was I was coughing so I just assumed it went missing." The teenager said she was eventually satisfied that the pin had been lost and went to the prom, where she ate and drank without any pain or discomfort. Garvey's mother took her to the doctor the following day as a precaution, and an X-ray quickly revealed the pin's hiding place. "It went down my throat, down my trachea and in my bronchial tube right before my lung," Garvey said. Doctors were able to remove the pin with a scope and determined there was no damage to the teenager's body.


*--------- That's About Par for Florida ---------*

An enormous alligator was seen walking across the fairway at a golf course in Florida as onlookers captured video footage. Charles Helms, 56, recorded video of the massive gator at Buffalo Creek Golf Course as it made its way across the course. "He was at a pretty safe distance," Helms said of his friend David Matos who can also be seen filming the gator. "This alligator was so large he would only move slowly --about 100 feet at a time -- before having to lie down and rest so he probably wasn't in as much danger as it may have appeared. An alligator expert may refute that; I'm just going on what I have been told." Golf course employee Wendy Schofield said the gator has been seen at the course multiple times and has not been known to pose a threat to golfers. "He doesn't bother anybody and they don't bother him, he's like a mascot for the course," she said.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

It is amazing how little people know about animals. Yes you do a dance for the lion. You walk in front of him dragging a leg. You do the dance to pretend you are injured... If you are in the water you bleed to attract sharks. Why do city folk environmentalists know so little about animals and animal behavior? -John
[Does that work for gorillas too?]

What I'd like to know is what kind of car the meth-head was using for collateral. You know he's probably going to default. And when he does, you get a decent vehicle for a thousand bucks or so. Sounds like good business to me.

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

Top Viewed Issues