Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Greetings fellow Bizarros: I know it is New Year's Day, but I was on vacation the last few days (as readers might have deduced from the dearth of comments in the last issue), however I have found what might be the perfect Christmas bizarre story.
South Carolina authorities say a 44-year-old woman angry at a man for returning home without beer on Christmas beat and stabbed him with a ceramic squirrel.
The Charleston County Sheriff's office says in a report that deputies found a man covered with blood when they arrived at Helen Williams' North Charleston home. She told investigators the man fell and cut himself, but couldn't explain why her hands and clothes were also bloody.
Deputies say the man said Williams was so angry when he returned without beer because stores were closed on Christmas Eve that she grabbed a ceramic squirrel, beat him in the head, then stabbed him in the shoulder and chest.
Williams was charged with criminal domestic violence. It wasn't known if she had a lawyer.
The squirrel did not survive intact.
Bizarrely,
LewisQuestions? Comments?
Email Lewis*-- Kuwait divorces result from bad manners, toothpaste squeezing --*KUWAIT CITY - A Kuwaiti woman filed for divorce from her husband, citing the "shocking sight" of him using bread to eat his peas, court record state. the Kuwaiti daily al-Qabas said the court heard the woman was disgusted by the "shocking sight" of her husband using his bread instead of a fork to eat his peas and decided his poor table manners were grounds for divorce, Gulf News reported Monday. Al-Qabas said the filing followed another divorce where the woman told the court her husband insisted on squeezing the toothpaste out from the middle of the tube. "We are always arguing," she was quoted as saying. "I keep telling him that he should squeeze in the end of the tube, but he stubbornly refuses and keeps squeezing it in the middle. He is so obstinate." Another recent divorce involved a man deciding to end his marriage when his wife refused to bring him a glass of water, saying it was a job for their domestic helper. A Kuwaiti legal expert told al-Qabas divorces in the country often result from couples being unable to accept one another's habits. The expert said couple's should take time to get to know one another prior to their marriages so they avoid unpleasant surprises later that could lead to divorce.
*-- Robbers hand back out-of-date cellphone --*NEW YORK - A man robbed by two men in New York's Central Park said they returned his cellphone when the outdated gadget apparently failed to meet their standards. Kevin Cook, one of two men robbed by the duo shortly after midnight Saturday, said one mugger displayed a gun and said he would shoot the victims if they made any noise, WINS-AM, New York, reported Monday. The robbers took a cellphone, a briefcase and a wallet containing about $114 cash. But Cook said one of the robbers gave him back his phone. "He just took a look at it and he didn't recognize it at all. I just assumed that he couldn't make any money off of it. So he handed it back to me and a minute later I was able to call 911 and get the whole thing started," Cook said. Cook said there turned out to be an upside to his outdated 2010 LG Quantum. "It's like, finally a pro for having something out of date," he said. The robbers were described as a black man and a Hispanic man, both in their 20s.
*-- READER COMMENTS --*Lewis; If that guy could have received a 12 pack of Corona for a 4 foot long alligator how much do you think I might get for my ex-wife? -Wes
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Depends on how likely she is to bite.]
Dear BN Lewis, Did you take the day off? Or did everyone else - and not send anything in for you to comment on? The comments are sometimes the best part! Ok, here you go! You may comment on my comment. -Lisa Orangevale, CA
Lewis, As a teacher I get the "do not touch" environment now found in Every school. In this case, if all the facts are presented, the parent is correct. The teacher should have first expressed her dislike or discomfort with the student "hugging" her to him and/or his parents before involving the law. I think this a good example of a teacher going to the other extreme to avoid any comment or suggestion of inappropriate behavior on their part. -Sharon
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It sounds like part of the zero-tolerance policies so many schools are adopting, but I did read a follow-up to this story which indicated that the student had been reprimanded for unwanted contact before.]
Tsk! what ever happened to the Christmas spirit - and why did it take several days to arrest the guys? They couldn't wait a few more days and arrest the guy in 2014?
I notice, in your reader comments, no one dare criticise you. Why? Do you get zapped with a delete if you do? Just curious, Waz in South Africa
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If you "was" in South Africa, where are you now?]
That would be the last time those sons were allowed in my house. Hope mom doesn't talk dad into dropping the charges. See how the youngest like foster parents and the adult teen likes living on his own. That's horrible. I would not have even considered raising my hand, much left a shovel, to either of my parents, not matter the provocation and believe me, I had provocation. -catt
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I have discussed child discipline in Bizarre News before and instigated a flood of vitriolic and vituperative emails, so I will not start digging that hole again here, but I will say that if you haven't taught your children discipline and respect by the time they are teens, then it is too late. Anybody who knows anything about teenagers knows you can't teach them anything, and you probably deserve a shovel to the head for being a shitty parent.]
*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --****Missed an Issue? Visit the Bizarre News ArchivesWell, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: LEWIS