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Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
There are worse tragedies that could befall a person on New
Year's day. In fact, I personally know a lot of people who
would prefer to spend their New Year this way.
It seems patrons at the highest-altitude pub in Britain said
heavy snowfall left them stranded at the bar for three days
while awaiting rescue by snowplows.
Workers and patrons at the Tan Hill Inn in North Yorkshire,
England, said about 30 people were trapped inside the pub
by a white-out snowstorm New Year's Day and remained stuck
in the snow for three days at the business, which is located
1,732 feet above sea level.
"Morale's been high -- people realized they wouldn't be
trapped forever," said Mike Carter, 44, assistant manager
of the pub. "They've peeled carrots and potatoes and helped
make dinner."
Many of the trapped customers were members of Leeds
University's Cross Country Club. "We were meant to go the
next day," club member Nathan Martin, 26, said. "Luckily
none of us was in a rush to get home! It's been good.
There's been a quiz every night which has kept us going."
A quiz and all the beer you can drink.
Bizarrely,
Lewis
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+----------- Even More Bizarre January Holiday ------------+
January 20 is National Buttercrunch Day
January 21 is Rid the World of Fad Diets, Gimmicks Day,
and Squirrel Appreciation Day
January 22 is National Answer Your Cat's Question Day
January 23 is National Handwriting Day, National Pie Day,
and Measure Your Feet Day
January 24 is Eskimo Pie Patent Day
January 25 is Opposite Day
January 26 is Australia Day
January 27 is Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day
January 28 is National Kazoo Day, Clash Day, and Rattle
Snake Round-Up Day
January 29 is National Cornchip Day
January 30 is Inane Answering Message Day
January 31 is National Popcorn Day and Child Labor Day
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----------- Grammar vandals awarded book deal -------------
PORTLAND, Ore. - Two U.S. men convicted on federal
vandalism charges for fixing typos on public signs
said they have landed a book deal to write about their
adventures. Benjamin Herson of Oregon and Jeff Deck of
Massachusetts said they were given a $150,000 advance
to write "The Great Typo Hunt," which is due out Aug. 3,
The (Norfolk) Virginian-Pilot reported. The men were
sentenced to probation and ordered to stay out of national
parks for a year for correcting the grammar on a 70-year-
old sign at the Grand Canyon's South Rim during their
2008 cross-country typo trek. They credited the case's
publicity with helping them land the book deal. "The
overreaction of the government probably helped us a lot
in terms of getting this deal," Herson said. "It's one of
those true lemonade-out-of-lemons stories."
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--------- Pranksters dress statue as Homer Simpson ---------
DUNCHURCH, England - Residents of a British town said
pranksters carried on a 40-year tradition of disguising
a statue in the village, this time as Homer Simpson. Tony
Kember, 66, chairman of the Dunchurch, England, historical
society, said the village's 19th century statue of Lord
John Scott was disguised as "The Simpsons" patriarch as
part of an annual prank tradition that has previously
featured the statue dressed as Harry Potter, Spider-Man,
Guy Fawkes and Shrek, The Sun reported. "I have lived in
the village for over 40 years and people were dressing
up the statue before that," Kember said. "Nobody in the
village seems to know who the culprits are -- or if they
do they are not telling anyone," he said. "People in the
village love seeing the statue dressed up, it is always
a surprise which character he will be."
------------------------------------------------------------
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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Didn't scientists also say that bumble bees are not aero-
dynamically able to fly. But they do it anyway. Since angels
are the souls of people I would guess that this guy is not
taking weight into account. -Keith
[Are you suggesting there is such a thing as fat angels?]
Needless to say that those Cherubs and Angels could not fly
commercially either what with their wings they would take
up too many seats and what with the allergies to feathers
that occur in our world, compounded with in a confined
space... Bob
Lewis, you're just too *^%$#(&"">!+@-ng cool..!! -Isaac=
Arrrgghhhh, arrrgghhhhh, arrrgghh. [Recent story reference]
Arrrgggghhhhhhh! -TJ
[This is one of the most lucid reader comments I've received
recently.]
Hey Lewis, how's this for a strange new product. There's a
new mint on the market called Linger. It's described as "a
small, naturally sweetened flavoring, free of artificial
dyes, which was created to flavor the secretions of a woman
when she is sexually aroused." (Hint: it's for your pussy!)
[Yes, I concluded that, thank you. Whatever happened to
bringing fruit or chocolate syrup or whipped cream or some-
thing into the bedroom in order to get kinky? Now we need a
chemically designed "mint?" No thanks.]
------------------ END OF READER COMMENTS ------------------
Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: mailto:lewis@gophercentral.com
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