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Saturday, May 21, 2016

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It's easy to lose track of time if you're not on a schedule. Say you stop for some gas. You fill up, maybe you buy a few instant lottery tickets and scratch them, you nurse your blueberry slushie and make a couple phone calls.

But not everybody shares your laissez faire attitude toward time.

An employee at one California gas station got more than a little fed up at one such customer.

Police launched an investigation after a video has emerged, showing the gas station employee using a bat to vandalize a truck because the driver stayed too long at the pump.

The video that was taken with a cellphone shows the female employee of a Valero gas station counting down before hitting the truck numerous times.

The owner of the truck who identified himself as Ray, said he was shocked by the attack and feared for his safety. Police officers who responded to the scene, arrested the woman on a charge of vandalism.

She was booked into jail, and her bail was set at $20,000.

Ray admitted that he was sitting in his truck making phone calls while he was filling his tank with gas. He said that he lost track of time, possibly staying there for about an hour before the employee launched the attack.


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*-- Why Are Chimney Dwellers Always Naked? --*

What is it about climbing down a chimney that makes crazy people want to take their clothes off? Carrie Sapp said she was working the next morning at the Carroll Redemption Center in Carroll, Iowa when she heard a man yell for help from the chimney. She said the man tried to explain, "I was playing hide-and-seek with my cousin. Don't call the cops." But the police were called, as was the fire department, which eventually managed to free the soot-covered, naked man. Firefighters initially planned to use a rope to pull Jordan Kajewski from the chimney, but eventually opted to hammer a hole in it and pulled him out. Though naked, the 29-year-old Kajewski had his clothes with him. "This was definitely a first for the Carroll Fire Department," Fire Chief Greg Schreck said. Kajewski was charged with trespassing.


*------- When You Gotta Go, You Gotta Go -------*

A television reporter was arrested on a charge of public urination or defecation after allegedly being seen defecating on a homeowner's property, according to police in Arizona. The Goodyear Police Department said that they have arrested CBS reporter Jonathan Lowe, after being accused of pulling down his pants and defecating on a lawn that did not belong to him. According to the police investigation, while Lowe was reporting about a man who killed a dog in the neighborhood, he went onto a lawn and defecated. A passerby noticed what Lowe was doing and called the police. The officers approached Lowe, who told him that he had to do defecate and could not hold it in.


*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

Nurse sharks are incredibly docile but I guess there is a limit to even what they will tolerate. But it must be remembered that we are talking about Florida.

Was the woman allowed to keep the shark after it was removed? I hear they are delicious if prepared properly.
[You must be from Florida.]

Who can be depressed when you're seeing aztec pyramids and shit? It's coming down off the fuckers that gets depressing. Not that I would know from personal experience or anything.

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

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