fiogf49gjkf0d
Bizarre News - April 15, 2015
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
Okay, so you are driving around with a large quantity of loose gunpowder in your front seat (for some reason). If you get the urge to spark up a smoke, don't! That is unless you are planning on making a homemade bomb, in which case go ahead and light up.
It is unclear whether Joseph Brennan of Massachusetts was planning to make a bomb. What is clear is that he blew himself clean out of the driver's door of his Toyota Camry when he lit a smoke.
A bystander heard the explosion from a block away and came running. He found Brennan with singed hair and burns on his face, lying in the street next to his burning vehicle.
"I'm an idiot," was the first thing Brennan allegedly told the bystander. "I lit a cigarette with gunpowder in the front seat."
Once again, what Brennan was doing with loose gunpowder is unclear, but according to the bystander he risked his life to go back to his wrecked vehicle where he allegedly removed multiple items and put them in the trunk.
This, of course, did not deter the police who searched Brennan's car, where they removed 14 liquids and powders, some of which when combined could create what they called a destructive device.
Sounds like 'bomb' to me.
Brennan allegedly told police he had gotten various materials from a friend to tinker with. "I wasn't going to do anything malicious," he said, according to the report.
Police Chief Theodore Ross said in a statement that law enforcement searched Brennan's house and found "precursor components, detonators, and one completed incendiary device." Although Brennan's Facebook page shows an interest in rocket propellants, so it is probably harmless tinkering.
Bomb or amateur rocketry, he certainly found a quick way to remove a lot of body hair.
Bizarrely,
Lewis
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click
GopherArchives
Questions? Comments?
Email Lewis
*-- Minnesota Senate votes to keep ban on eye contact --*
ST. PAUL, Minn. (UPI) - The Minnesota Senate voted to keep rules banning senators from making eye contact during floor debate and from having drinking water on the floor. Sen. Warren Limmer, R-Maple Grove, spoke in favor of striking the rule that bars senators from looking at one another during floor debate, requiring them to instead keep their eyes on the Senate president. "I find this particular rule of the Senate, dare I say, antiquated," Limmer said. However, Senate Majority Leader Tom Bakk, D-Cook, said the rule is still relevant to the process. He said looking at one another during debates could cause deliberations to become personal. "Our decorum would probably not be as Senate-like as we would like to have it" if the rule was changed, Bakk said. The Senate sided with Bakk in a 15-44 vote. The body also voted 10-51 Monday to keep a longstanding ban on beverages, including water, on the floor of the Senate. The votes earned the Senate some ribbing on Twitter from colleagues in the Minnesota House of Representatives. "Long Live the House! Where even Senators can come over and drink water on the House Floor," Rep. Tim Sanders, R-37B, tweeted. "Other Senate rules: use secret handshake, speak in iambic pentameter, drag Stone of Shame if you violate a rule," tweeted Rep. Mike Freiberg, D-45B.
*-- Georgia man's bullet bounces off armadillo, hits mother-in-law --*
LEESBURG, Ga. (UPI) - Police in Georgia said a bullet fired at an armadillo ricocheted off the animal's armored hide and struck the shooter's mother-in-law. The Lee County Sheriff's Office said Larry McElroy, 54, fired his 9 mm pistol at an armadillo Sunday night and the bullet bounced off the animal's armored skin and went through a fence, a door and a chair to strike mother-in-law Carol Johnson, 74, in the back. Investigators said McElroy was about 100 yards away from Johnson's home when he fired the shot, which killed the armadillo. Bill Smith, an investigator with the sheriff's office, said Johnson was not severely injured. "She was walking around on her own power and talking," Smith told WALB-TV. "It didn't appear to be too severe. They took her to Phoebe North [hospital]." He described the case, which did not lead to any arrests or citations, as bizarre. "Just the circumstances, just all the way around, the whole situation was unusual," Smith said. Smith said shooting at nuisance armadillos is not against the law, but McElroy might want to use a different gun next time. "I really think if they're going to shoot at varmints and whatnot, maybe use a shotgun... with a spread pattern with a lot less range," Smith said. Armadillos are often seen as a nuisance by those whose lawns and gardens have been targeted by the skilled diggers.
*-- READER COMMENTS --*
That's another good reason not to be a cop, "...officers conducting a strip search said a bag of a leafy green substance fell out of his rectum. The contents of the bag smelled like marijuana..." Sure wouldn't have wanted to be the one who had to pick it up and take a sniff. -Tom
[
Or be the cop who had to plant it there.]
a bag of a leafy green substance fell out of his rectum. The contents of the bag smelled like marijuana... I would think that that would be preferable to any other smell that bag may have. Thanks for your very enjoyable newsletter. -Jerry the Xbuffoon
Lewis, did you see this story? My advice for this guy would be to 'stick' to it! Guinness might yet notice thee one day. -hugs, LilyKat
"He's known as India's 'Needle Man' for his ability to stick hundreds of surgical needles into his face at once. Bhupan Chandra claims he once stuck 550 of them in his face at one time and could have done more, but was limited by a time restriction."
[
Everyone needs a hobby. I guess there's not a lot to do in India.]
*-- END OF READER COMMENTS --*
***
Missed an Issue? Visit the Bizarre News Archives
Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
Send comments and questions to: LEWIS