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GENUINE LEATHER MEN'S TRIFOLD WALLET
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December 1, 2010
Greetings...
Hard to believe that a new year will begin exactly one month from
today. For some, the last month will fly by because of the hectic
holiday schedules. For some, the year can't end soon enough because
the new year gives them hope that some of the struggles of this year
will be behind them and the new year will give them a much needed
fresh start...
After hearing something last week regarding the state of marriage
today as well as more and more women and couples deciding not to
have children, I wondered how many people would change certain aspects
of their lives if given a "do-over"...
Admitting it to anyone isn't necessary and would probably lead to
hurt feelings. This is about admitting it to yourself, just for the
heck of it...
Because the times we now live in are so different from the way most
of us, or our parents grew up in, it's hard to casually give an answer
to some of the questions I am going to ask. The times determined certain
behaviors and "rules", vs now, where it seems that people make up the
rules as they go along to benefit one person, themselves, in most cases...
For generations, boys and girls got married right out of high school. Some
of those couples are celebrating 50+ years of marriage. Some are not and
hung in there until they could no longer stand to look at each other, or
until their children grew up...
Some were "shamed" into getting married because being an unwed mother
was worse than being the Whore of Babylon...
Question...If you were one that got married at an early age, would you
marry that young again and depending on the circumstances, would you
have married the person you did marry?
Women have always been told one of their purposes in life is to have
children, and as many as they could, preferably sons. "Biological clock"
was a term developed to remind a woman she may be running out of time
to be "fulfilled". Some women are unable to have children and some
women should never have children given some of the things I have seen
through the years...
More women today are educated and in positions that give them the opportunity
and choice to have children, or not, with or without a husband or partner.
I don't think it's too suprising to know that women today are also deciding
that they do not want to have children or need to have children to feel
"fulfilled"...
Any of us who have children can't imagine not having them, however...
Question...If you had to do it again, would you have children, would
you have less children, and if you're a man or woman who had a marraige
end because of the pressures of having children, do you think your
marriage would have survived if you didn't have children?
I realize there are millions of parents being cared for by their child
or children, my owm mother being one of them, this isn't about making
the decision to have children so there will be someone to take care of
you when you're older...
While things may have changed over the years with the way people view
what they should or shouldn't do, can or can't do, or want to do, some
things haven't, or won't change...
Young kids will still get married much too young, girls will still get
pregnant and "have" to get married or keep the baby without getting
married. People will still have more children than they can afford,
and more and more children will be products of divorce, maybe even
more than one, given the modern family of "yours, mine, ours"...
Hindsight is always 20/20. Today's column is just an opportunity to
ponder choices that were made when it came to marriage and children,
and privately answer the question...
Would you do it again with the same outcome?