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January 25, 2010

Greetings...

What Happens in Vegas Stays In Vegas, too bad the only thing that
stayed in Vegas was my money! I'm back in Arizona and my mom and
sister are back in Chicago. Flyboy won't be home until later today
because he had to leave on Friday to dart and weave through rain,
sleet, snow, and high winds all over the country. Over the
weekend, rain was the big story in the West. It was raining when
I left Phoenix and was welcomed by non-stop rain in Vegas the
whole time we were there. The temperature was low enough to
cause severe shivering while waiting for cabs, and no, it wasn't
because I'm used to warm weather. My mom and sister were just as
cold as I was...

continued below...

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*

We all had a great time and it was nice to be able to spend time
with my mom. She and I spent a few hours in my room having coffee
just talking, talking, talking. I was impressed with my mom's ability
to ignore not only the time, but our suggestions that she take a
break and get some rest. In fact, I had flashbacks of "the look"
when I tried to get her to call it a night at midnight!

Her vision is definitely better than it was the last time I saw
her a few months ago. I would be lying if I told you she is
doing great. It was obvious the toll the constant pain of the
Shingles as well as all the surgical eye procedures have taken
on her and at times, I was glad her vision wasn't 100% because
she would have seen tears in my eyes many times during our trip...

She's always been a tiny little thing, but she seemed even tinier
to me this trip and much more fragile, and I guess my own fears
about her mortality got the better of me many times while looking
at her when she didn't know I was looking at her...


continued below...


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*

I tried to give my sister a little "break" so to speak at different=

times. I can't begin to tell you what wonderful care, love, compassion,=

and most importantly, patience she gives to my mom. Words alone will
never be enough to thank her and let her know how much she is
appreciated, not only by my mom, but by me. I've never been the
patient one and often wonder if I could do what my sister does and
after wondering, I always come up with the same answer. I don't
know. Even though she would venture off knowing I was taking care
of mom 100%, she would pop back often to see how she was, which
quite frankly, made me wonder if she thought I was going to abandon
my mom, withold food or drink, or walk her into traffic!!!

My mom and I have always been the closest out of the three siblings,
and I accept the "changing of the guard" so to speak with a little =

sadness, but a total understanding, admiration, and love for the reason..=
.

As anyone "out there" who is, or has been a caregiver, I applaud you,=

and for those family members who aren't for whatever reason, I share
your sadness and...guilt...

I realize I opened myself up telling you my feelings about this, but
that's what I do, I say things others won't say or admit, and I say
them to always let others know they aren't alone with their thoughts...=




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